Infatuation vs Love – How to Tell the Difference
After watching numerous love stories in movies and TV shows, we all feel unsure of what true love is. Is it the butterflies dancing in your stomach or the giddiness along with fantasies? Well, you cannot know that for sure unless you know all the facts about infatuation vs love.
There is a considerable difference between infatuation and love. You may confuse your fantasies with love and expect perfection in your new connection. Moreover, you may feel your obsession is love, and it deserves equal reciprocation. If you are lucky, your feelings will be reciprocated; however, this romance novel type of love does not happen in all connections.
It is not easy to stay in love and get over someone who does not reciprocate the same. Whether you wish to explore yourself or find true love in life, you will have to know about signs of love and infatuation. Keep on reading to learn how to differentiate between infatuation and love so that you can assess your new relationship.
What is Infatuation?
As per the infatuation definition, it is a strong feeling towards someone that includes obsession, fascination, and fixation. It is a feeling that comes from immediate attraction even when you do not know much about that person.
The fixation caused by infatuation may give an illusion of having found the one in just one meeting. Infatuation can feel like an intense rush and may focus more on the fantasy world.
On the other hand, love is feeling safe with the other person. Your feeling is less obsessive, and you feel protective of the other person. Moreover, you have mutual respect and unending affection in the connection. Love makes you accept both the good and the bad about your partner.
The Confusing Battle: True Love vs Infatuation
Each new connection has a honeymoon period, and it becomes a bit challenging to know if it is infatuation or love. With infatuation, you may feel instant euphoria and excitement.
The newness in your relationship may make you ecstatic and irrational at times. In this phase, you will experience being over the moon and just looking at the positives. As a result, you tend to ignore red flags in your partner.
If you have fallen in love, you will not focus on instant gratification and reciprocation of your feelings. You’ll concentrate on building a healthy connection. Moreover, you will feel vulnerable with your person and safe sharing your deep intimate moments in love.
Note that love and infatuation are not interchangeable when it comes to long-term relationships. That is why it is important to know all about infatuation vs love.
Infatuation is quick and fantasy based
When you feel intoxicated by the way someone looks and communicates, you feel quickly falling head over heels for that person. Moreover, you may be in a state of constant happiness. You only focus on that person throughout the day and may even want to talk to them all the time.
Besides, you may start fantasizing about them in your future. Your fantasies may become unhealthy very soon if you do not catch yourself in the moment.
Another downside is that you will not want to show your negative sides to that person to turn them off. This happens in a lot of new relationships too. Some women may feel confused about why men pull away even at the slightest moment of vulnerability. Chances are they are not in love and just infatuated by you.
Being infatuated may give you false hope of your relationship working out, but it is primarily a bigger compromise if you are the only one putting in the effort.
Love is patient
We all have heard of love being patient and kind. It is true and won’t make you doubt your feelings. Being in love is magical, and it also has a mutual sense of responsibility. When you are with the person you love, you feel respected and secure.
This connection doesn’t feel mentally draining but rather fulfilling and energizing. You are able to share your future dreams with your partner and work to achieve them with each other.
Even your individual dreams feel supported by your partner. Moreover, you may not worry about what your significant other will think after learning about your dark side and fears. In love, they will understand you and communicate how they feel instead of you playing the guessing game.
You both will be willing to work on the relationship and be patient in building healthy patterns. Furthermore, you’ll no longer need to worry about getting hurt as your partner will not abandon you after the first fight.
Infatuation forces obsession
Your mood may entirely depend on your partner and the fact that they haven’t replied to your messages all day. This can lead to obsession and feeling inadequate. However, this only happens when the connection is one-sided. When you are infatuated with your potential partner, you may wish to spend every waking hour with your newfound love.
Moreover, spiraling down with obsessive thoughts about the tiniest of details may make you anxiously attached to a partner who is not available in the same way. This obsession can lead to insecurities and anxiety.
For your relationship to not end up in this unhealthy dynamic, it is important to know what men want in a relationship with women and vice versa. The key is to not fuel your obsession and have clear communication with your significant other.
Love brings calmness
Have you seen people in long-term relationships appear happier and more conformable in their skin? This is exactly why people feel excited to fall in love and have their person by their side. Love makes people feel calm and true to themselves even when it requires them to be vulnerable.
True love means feeling comfortable with showing who you really are and what you really want, believe and value in life. It also means not trying to pretend to be someone else that you think your partner would love or want but staying true to yourself.
People in love can share everything about themselves under the sun and do not mind exposing their inner child. They feel at home with their partner while discussing the most embarrassing details about their day. This connection of true love goes beyond physical looks. It is accepting of changes such as weight gain, wrinkles, new careers, and physical distance.
Love is all about calmness that comes from the fact that you can rely on each other. Even if your partner is busy, you will still feel the warmth of their love. The constant work to maintain the relationship will be mutual, and your love won’t fade away in a few months.
How is True Love Different from Infatuation?
Have you tried to find out how to make a man fall deeply in love with you? Do you wish to get out of the stage of mixed signals from a partner? The following signs of infatuation and true love may guide you in your journey of love.
Signs of infatuation
- You consider the person to be your perfect match.
- You idealize your partner in unrealistic ways.
- You think about them all the time.
- Your mood gets affected when they do not talk to you.
- You have not met this person but feel strongly for them.
- You create different situations in your fantasy and believe that they would act perfectly in every situation.
- You are more attracted to their potential than to who they actually are.
- You daydream about your future with them.
- You are more attracted to their physical features.
- When they do not meet up to your fantasies, you think they’re just having a bad day.
- You stalk them on social media throughout the day.
- You do not focus on red flags and incompatibility.
- Your relationship gets serious too quickly.
- You are concerned about impressing them and not showing your vulnerability.
- You may change your behavior for them.
Signs of True Love
- You are securely attached to your partner.
- You do not expect your partner to be there for you all the time.
- You give them space.
- You enjoy relationship milestones instead of just crossing them quickly.
- Their growth does not threaten you.
- You feel pure joy every time you meet them, even after a bad day.
- You do not have trust issues or feel jealous.
- You have a healthy way of communicating negative feelings such as anger and disappointment.
- You do not feel like getting back at them after a disagreement.
- You don’t get involved in petty fights.
- You both work on the relationship and focus on spending quality time together.
- Your relationship is more than just physical attraction.
- You both are able to motivate each other to achieve future dreams.
- Even after years of being together, your relationship is still loving and caring.
- You can make sacrifices for the well-being of your partner without feeling resentful.
- Both the partners have common goals for the relationship.
- You are considerate of each other’s feelings.
- Your respect boundaries in the relationship.
The Difference Between Love and Infatuation
In comparison to infatuation, love lasts longer and has deeper emotions. Here are some more differences between the two.
Love will make you feel warm, while infatuation will mentally and emotionally drain you due to obsessive thoughts.
You will experience love to be easy in comparison to an infatuation that requires constant showering of praises and materialistic gifts.
Your attachment style may become anxious during the state of infatuation. On the other hand, you will feel safe when in love with your partner.
Love will not make you feel like living on an edge all the time. Connections with strong feelings of infatuation may seem shallow, and one single agreement may end them.
After the honeymoon phase, your relationship is on the verge of ending if you are both just infatuated. In love, you will move on to a secure state that has a healthy commitment.
Infatuation will fade away quickly once you get close to that person. On the other hand, love grows deeper as time passes.
You idealize your partner if you are infatuated with them. Love makes you more accepting of your partner’s flaws and shortcomings.
Love is selfless and understanding. Infatuation may make you selfish and unable to think about your partner’s well-being.
Infatuation vs Love – Can infatuation turn into love?
Relationships require time to flourish. Some relationships start from the stage of infatuation and are able to reach the state of deep love. However, it is hard to determine how much work and time this may require.
Some people may be willing to wait for their partner to fall in love, while some may become frustrated and give up. A person needs their significant other to reciprocate the same feelings for infatuation to turn into love.
Moreover, after getting into a relationship, your infatuation may fade away. This moment is critical because it’s where the decision is made if it’s worth continuing the relationship or breaking it up.
As a woman, you need to know that you have an influence on a man’s feelings towards you. If you know how to trigger his infatuation or hero instinct he will commit to you and start to see you as “the only one”.
Infatuation is not something to be afraid of as it is not a bad thing. It may be a starting point for a long-term relationship. However, you have to get over the stage of infatuation and trigger certain instincts in a man to make him hooked on you. That way he will see you as his perfect woman and will do everything to make you happy.
So take your time to get to know each other and your personal and professional goals in life. Work on a healthy bond and honest communication so that your relationship gets stronger after the honeymoon stage.
Men and women have a slightly different approach while navigating feelings of infatuation and love. Women are mostly unaware of the fact how differently men operate in relationships due to their basic nature. Infatuation scripts can be a helpful tool to learn about a man’s desires and instincts but there are some general things that you need to have in common to have a good basis for a loving and lasting relationship.
Instead of focusing on the end result, take your time in knowing your partner and yourself in a relationship. If you can both accept and love each other the way you really are your relationship has huge potential and will nurture and energize both of you instead of causing a future drama. With the right approach, you’ll be able to enjoy the stage of falling in love while also cultivating a long-lasting union.